The Box Co.

Loathing Is Just Another Word for "I'm A Total Douche"

Brendon informed me recently that since some change was made in my Wordpress Installation, all of my password protected or private posts were visible to everyone. It was very deceiving, because they still had “Protected:” or “Private:” affixed to the start of the title itself, but it was all just a weak deception on the part of Wordpress to reveal all my deep and dark secrets. As I was going through them and re-adding passwords, I was able to review a lot of interesting little stories involving a past romantic relationship and a past living arrangement, both of which were described in very bitter or melodramatic terms.

I am amazed at how little any of that seems relevant at this point in my life.

Then, I stumbled across a post where I wrote very angrily about someone, and I thought to myself “Wow, I was a total asshole here”. I recall the post causing a tremendous conflict some time ago, and I recall leaving it on my blog (heavily concealed) as a reminder of the whole thing. As a read through the whole post again today, I thought to myself, “I cannot believe that I ever cared about any of this crap, or let this phase me. These are such non-issues. What the hell is wrong with me?”

I don’t feel like I behave this way anymore. In general, I consider myself to be a less angry person, and I try not to let minor conflicts agitate me anymore. This blog has certainly helped to put in perspective that I was quite a prick when I was younger (and maybe I still am, but just a little one*). I am profoundly disappointed with myself for the way that I acted back then, and I hope that anyone who I have ever offended by acting like a real asshole can forgive me.

Also, don’t bother looking up any of those private posts, as I have re-protected them (and now most of their titles are “Protected: Private: Protected: Post Title”). Thoroughly ridiculous.

*Feel free to make jokes about that line. I will not stop you.

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