Over at Capcom’s website, there are two terrible writers who think that they could create a better storyline for Resident Evil 4. They have a large list of problems, but I will only name a few.

First, the writing style used by both is just terrible. They write in half-assed RPG style that isn’t accepted on most forums. So, every action is surrounded by an asterisk (*) and the dialogue has the speaker’s name and a colon proceeding. Here’s an example of that kind of writing for those of you with poor imaginative abilities:

Jordan went to the fridge and grabbed the milk

Jordan: This milk smells rancid.

Binks looked over

Binks: Indeed.

Binks takes a puff of his pipe

As you can see, it is a difficult style to read and can become very annoying to write with. I don’t know why they are incapable of using standard paragraphs and simple quotation symbols. It isn’t an overly difficult task to use the English language properly. Instead, they have given birth to a hybrid between standard screenplay writing and Internet speak. Basically, they are lacking in cognitive faculties.

The second issue, and this is the major one, is that they have such a terrible storyline. They essentially hated Resident Evil 4, not because the story was bad, but because it didn’t have the characters they wanted in it. So, they begin their version of Resident Evil 4 the same as the released game, and then they remove the character and replace it with Chris Redfield (the one they all love).

It’s retarded. They are all retarded. I was providing a critique of their work on a regular basis. Each critique was two to four pages (and I was being gentle with my comments). Then, they removed the comments page. Apparently, they can’t stand criticism unless it is something to the tune of: “Your work is so amazing. In fact, it’s too amazing, and I find it difficult to admire because you are so superior in your Godliness.”

Anyway, I have received no responses from Capcom or Nintendo, so I will continue to wait it out. I have semi high hopes, but I’m not going to sing from the rooftops before I’m sure of anything.

I will follow this post with another, entirely unrelated post, pertaining more to life…and how I lack the ability to live it.