Prepare yourself to be rocked by the most obese blog entry thou hath ever seen.
This one is going to be a three parter, so if you feel it necessary to grab some popcorn, a blanket, and your high school sweetheart, feel free to do so.
I’ll wait.
Act One: A City of Vices
The first thing that I must spill my guts over (I’m witty) is the release of Sin City. It came, I saw, and it rocked! Absolutely brilliant. Quite possibly one of the finest pieces of media entertainment that has graced my irises to date. It was based off of the set of graphic novels by Frank Miller, specifically The Hard Goodbye, The Big Fat Kill, and That Yellow Bastard.
The performances on the part of Mickey Rourke (Marv), Bruce Willis (Hartigan) and Elijah Wood (Kevin) were excellent. Leading ladies that sparkled and shined were Devon Aoki (Miho) and Alexis Bledel (Becky), who were both surprisingly interesting prostitutes.
Another notable performance would have to be to Marley Shelton (The Customer) and Josh Hartnett (The Salesman) for their absolutely stupendous opening to the film. Hartnett only appeared in the bookends of the film (the beginning and end, to the unwise) but still, his character was so cool. He played some hired assassin, who’s motto is, the customer is always right. Hence, the name.
Here’s the excerpt from the end of the opening scene:
The Salesman: The wind rises electric. She’s soft and warm and almost weightless. Her perfume is sweet promise that brings tears to my eyes. I tell her that everything will be all right; that I’ll save her from whatever she’s scared and take her far far away. I tell her that I love her. [silenced gunshot] The Salesman: The silencer makes a whisper of the gunshot. I hold her close until she’s gone. I’ll never know what she was running from. I’ll cash her check in the morning.
A very good scene. Absolutely amazing really. I’m tempted to go to the theatres simply to see it all over again.
Act Two: Home on the Shooting Range
Yesterday, after I returned from school, I fell asleep at the computer table. When I awoke, my father was making supper and my mother was not speaking to him. I asked my sisters what was going on, and they said it had something to do with me. I wondered, “How, I haven’t even been awake. What could I have possibly done wrong in all this time?”
But anyway, my parents are fighting with eachother, but they are taking it out on us. This is ridiculous, because we didn’t do anything. We get punished if we do something wrong, we get punished if we do something right, we get punished if we don’t do anything. There is no way to win in this family.
Act Three: The Third Act
I conceded to the wishes of the masses, and I purchased a prom ticket. My ticket number is 80. Out of a graduating class of 200 or so students, this is not a good sign. Sure, there is a significant number of people, but 80 is a really small number. It’s staggeringly ridiculous.
Anyway, I figure the night wont be a complete waste. If I can squeeze in a dance with Dianne Murray, Rachel Voros, Kathryn Nicholson, Lindsay Dicksen, Kate Weersink, or Karen Vanderwalle it would be nice. If I could dance with all of them, it would be even better. Doubt it’ll happen, but at least I can get my hopes up and feel the staggering effects of the pain of their plummet.
Anyway, I’m off. I’m going to go read some of the absolute garbage they are toting over on Fan Fiction Net. Check it out if you want to become an incoherent slob. If not, then don’t go near it. Please. For God’s sake!!!
Later.