Many of you said I couldn’t do it.

You scoffed at the idea of completing so many games in such a short time. You scoffed until your throat was dry, and swollen from scoffing so.

But it is I who has the last laugh. And mine is a truly sinister cackle that will corrupt the minds and hearts of all who hear it. For you see, while the rest of you doubted, I stood against the odds. You said I couldn’t do it and…

I didn’t.

Truth be told, it is now January 17th and I have yet to finished Castlevania (both), Meteos, Metroid Prime Hunters, Super Mario World, Yoshi’s Island, Tales of Phantasia, and Guitar Hero II. While these 8 may appear to represent a failure, you would be sorely mistaken. While the percentage of completion on this task was less than 50%, there has been an unexpected loophole in the Wii Challenge.

My father was unable to find a Wii, and therefore, the Wii Challenge presses onward until he does.

So, on the eve of my birthday, I went to EB Games and purchased Guitar Hero II. Immediately, my fingers were broken. The game is intense. Easy mode is pathetically simple. I get five stars every time. However, the jump to medium presents an unprecedented increase in difficulty. The transition to hard is even more impossible. I’ve beaten medium, but have yet to gain perfection on it. Free Bird has effectively destroyed my wrist with the 8 back-to-back “solo” sections (aka, the Fast Part).

As for the other games, my status is as follows.

• Level 6 in World 4/6 in Yoshi’s Island.
• Bonus Levels in Super Mario World (the ones above the Star area…all special “super-difficult” levels).
• Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin has me pitted against Dracula long before I am prepared in the Richter mode. Playing as the LeCarde sisters - with their horrid play mechanics - has me much further back. And I have yet to unlock the Old Axe Armor as a playable character.
• Castlevania: Dawn of Sorrow has Julius, Yoko and Alucard all insufficiently leveled to defeat Death.
• In Meteos, I am missing a few planets, and most of the weapons, song sets, etc.
• In Metroid Prime Hunters, I have 66% completion. I don’t know how that is possible. I figure I’m missing a few energy tanks, but I cannot find a guide to help me persevere. I’m starting to dislike Metroid Prime Hunters, because the game isn’t about exploration - which is what has made the Metroid series so enjoyable. The upgrades help you explore different areas, each more challenging than the last. Metroid Prime Hunters - instead - offers tiny worlds that only vary because of the other Hunters who attack you.
• In Tales of Phantasia, I have restarted the game. But I haven’t even gone back in time yet…so…yeah. Not that far. I think I will leave it until last.

Nevertheless, the Wii Challenge presses on.