The second day of tryouts begins!
In March of 2006, I began the process of evaluating Nintendo characters to see who would make the cut into the game that was then known as Super Smash Bros. Revolution. Since then, the Wii has been released and two trailers for the game has been shown. We have received a lot of information, but not a final roster list. While this information is rumoured to arrive before the fall ‘07 release, it is not fast enough for me.
The tryouts will involve the evaluation of Nintendo characters - old and new - for their compatibility with Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Old characters may be discarded; new ones may come out of unexpected places. It is time to resume the tryouts.
Step inside to see the evaluations of the remaining 14 characters from Super Smash Bros. Melee, as well as the first of over thirty new applicants.
Note: This post contains an absurd amount of images. Not recommended for people on dial-up.
The Tryouts “˜07 Day One - Day Two - Day Three - Day Four - Day Five - Final Roster The Rejects
In 1981, a giant ape escaped from a zoo in New York City, broke into a carpenter shop and kidnapped a young woman named Pauline. This ape, obsessed with movies, decided to mimic his big-screen idol by scaling a skyscraper with the young woman in his arms. However, unlike his cohort, he was not gunned down by bi-planes circling overhead. No, the young Kong whose name was Donkey was beaten by a young, straight-talken carpenter from the Bronx by the name of Jumpman.
Since then, things have switched up a fair bit. Donkey Kong is no longer worried about carpenters trying to bring him down. He has moved on to having his own adventures in a ‘country’ that bears his name, and participating in rhythm games, sports games, and over-sized board games. Yes, sitting atop his piles and piles of golden bananas is certainly the life for one of the most recognized characters of video gaming.
If you are considering Donkey Kong as a candidate to return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl, all of the aforementioned fame certainly comes into play. While I will admit that DK has run into a bit of a rough patch in his career (Donkey Konga anyone?), he is still one of Nintendo’s most prominent and famous characters. Many of us are hoping that he will eventually make a return to form. All of this soulful longing aside, Donkey Kong is guaranteed a spot in Super Smash Bros. Brawl based on the virtue of him being one of Nintendo’s oldest creations.
Now, let’s just pray that they use Donkey Kong in a decent console game for once, so that he wont slowly fade into the background. Good grief.
What’s happenin’ Captain?
This bounty hunter turned sports racer turned Smash Bros. fighter has certainly been living life in the fast lane, and - although his games have become progressively more difficult - he (and his franchise) continue to be immensely popular. And while you may not actually use him in F-Zero because you prefer, say, The Mighty Gazelle, everyone knows that the Captain - as one of the four original racers from the debut game - will have a presence in Super Smash Bros. iterations to come.
To be fair, I would like to point out that Captain Falcon’s attacks really have nothing to do with the game that he is in, and more about the name and uniform. While playing F-Zero, you are racing in hover cars on courses that were spawned from some architects worst nightmares. There is no title in which Captain Falcon leaves his vehicle and has flames explode from his body. The pyrokinesis is totally non-canon. Still, Captain Falcon provides a unique combination of speed and power that is not found in most of the other Super Smash Bros. fighters. And, since all of his attacks are melee, you always get that lovely, in-your-face style of fighting that many gamers love.
Expect to see Captain Falcon in Super Smash Bros. Brawl, if only for the sheer purpose of having someone to represent the F-Zero franchise that is not Samurai Goroh.
Fox’s co-pilot, and the best Arwing pilot of the Star Fox team, has an on-again, off-again working relationship with Fox McCloud and Co. That is to say, Falco has the tendency to leave and reappear in various games without explanation, likely meaning that he is a stubborn son of a bitch who is unwilling to take orders. Will this tendency to vanish without explanation carry over into Super Smash Bros. Brawl?
I certainly hope it does not. Falco is one of those characters that is totally bad ass to play as. Until unlocking Wolf O’Donnell in Star Fox Assault, he was the only character that I was willing to use (Fox is lame, Slippy is gay, and Krystal was a terrible, terrible decision).
The likelihood of Falco’s inclusion is still sketchy. On the one hand, there are many people who would like to see him make a return. He is a cool character, people like him, and at some point they are going to add a secondary character from the Star Fox franchise (as nearly every other game seems to be getting spare fighters). Also, if you take into account the type of weapons available in Star Fox Assault, the Falco character can be differentiated from Fox by giving him slower movements, heavier physical attacks, and more brawny range attacks (rocket launcher, grenade, or mini gun). On the other hand, Falco did originate as a clone character (copying the move set of Fox), and could be viewed by the development team as a throwaway character to make room for original properties like Pit or Wario.
Ultimately, his fate is uncertain. As much as I want him to return, his status is not set in stone, and things can turn either way.
What makes this punk think he is so freakin’ special? Psychic and telekinetic abilities? Please Ness. You’re just a dumb kid with a yo-yo and a baseball bat, who soars through space with his friends fighting evil. That is so Mike Jones of you. And at least his game was released state-side before the 8-bit era.
Ness, for the most part, is one of those Japan-only characters that the producers warned would be limited. To date, only one of his RPG adventures has been featured in North America: Mother 2, released on the Super Nintendo under the title ‘Earthbound’. Mother (Earthbound Zero) and Mother 3 (Earthbound 2) have not been released in North America, although they are supposedly coming.
In considering Ness’ return to the arena, we have to consider a few important details. First of all, Ness is a character whose popularity is greatest in Japan, not world-wide (despite a cult following in the States). And, the producers said that they would limit the uses of Japan-only characters to improve approachability. On the other hand, Ness’ games are going to be released in the United States and Canada soon as some sort of ‘Mother Compilation’. It is possible that they may continue to use Ness to boost his popularity before the release.
Finally, Ness was one of the original unlockables from the first game. As a result of this, he has grandfathered his way into the preferences of many gamers. As a result of this, it seems likely that Ness will be making a return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl, whether you like that smug little bastard or not.
The titular characters of the NES classic Ice Climbers have seen limited appeal on Nintendo systems since their first outing. Although their debut game has been re-released again and again, they have not been featured in any next-generation outing (until Super Smash Bros. Melee). Moreover, their player mechanics and limited appeal seem to have them headed straight for the chopping block.
More than that, Nintendo has expressly stated that previous characters may not make the return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl. As a result of this fact, and their limited appeal, the Ice Climbers may be getting the axe. Personally, I do not mind at all. The Ice Climbers were extremely dull, and had very little in the way of useful attacks. Even their stage is frustrating to play on.
There is - however - an undeniable fact that makes their presence in the game a remote possibility. In screenshots pulled from the two released trailers, we see brief clips of what appears to be a winter stage. None of the other characters have games centred in or even with access to a winter area. If this winter stage is intended to make it to the final release, then we may see the Ice Climbers tag along as well. Here is hoping they beef them up with some better attacks.
The royal matriarch of the kingdom of Hyrule has spent half of her career as a damsel in distress, and the other half dressing up in various outfits and adopting alternative personae. The latter half of her career has been the most exciting part, since she has played the part of the mysterious Sheik, the saucy pirate Tetra, and empowering the Twilight Princess - Midna - with her divine ‘Twiforce of Wisdom’ powers.
Zelda’s inclusion in Super Smash Bros. Melee allowed players to freely transform between the Princess and her form as Sheik. Will she return again in Super Smash Bros. Brawl? It seems extremely likely. While Zelda has not really had her own playable title (Phillips CD-I games do not count), she is still a key component of the Zelda franchise. And now that most of Nintendo’s main franchises are beginning to feature at least two fighters in Super Smash Bros., it seems likely that Zelda will make a return.
If and when she makes a return in Super Smash Bros. Brawl, hopefully they will try to incorporate some of her Tetra abilities into the mix, although that would require programming in two transformations (since leaving Sheik out would be a bad idea). Anyway, considering her popularity in the Zelda franchise and her unique play style in Super Smash Bros. Melee., she is very likely to make a return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl.
Ganondorf - the Prince of Darkness - has been the most prominent evil force in the Kingdom of Hyrule for over two decades. Usually residing in a tower whose location fluctuates based on some ancient algorithm, Ganondorf can be found plotting the ruin of the country in human or pig form. His weapon of choice: a sword and black magic. Or, if he is feeling saucy, a trident. Unfortunately for Ganondorf, he detests both light and silver (ever since his senior prom, where the prettiest girl in school was sporting a silver dress that captured the light…as she pushed him over the snack table and into the punch bowl). As a result of these peculiar aversions to light and silver, he is often easily bested when shot with an arrow that is tipped with such a material.
His appearance in Super Smash Bros. Melee was both shocking and disappointing. On the one hand, the ability to play as Ganondorf - the baddest of the bad - was a rare and thrilling treat. On the other hand, his moves were unbearably slow copies of Captain Falcon’s lightning fast melee attacks. So, in the end, Ganondorf was just a big, retarded, slow-moving power house. If you could make use of him, you were a king among men. And there were so few kings.
Despite his failings, I fully expect Ganondorf to make a return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl as a playable character again. Hopefully, we will be seeing some more unique attacks that harness both his swordplay and his abilities with black magic. It wouldn’t hurt to give the big guy his pig transformation from Twilight Princess to be a more daunting target and kick substantially more ass. In addition to Ganondorf’s potential abilities making him a likely addition, the voice actor for Ganondorf is signed onto Brawl to provide voice acting for…you guessed it, Ganondorf. While those sources are a bit sketchy, it is not outside of the realm of possibility.
Keep your fingers crossed people. I know I will.
The young boy who would one day be the Hero, Young Link has been featured in most Zelda games to date, ranging from the first game, all the way through to Majora’s Mask and beyond. There is strictly nothing that differentiates him from his other self, except a span of seven years asleep in a temple being watched by some creepy old Sage of Light.
Young Link was featured in Super Smash Bros. Melee as another one of the dreaded “clone” characters, with his moveset being a carbon copy of regular Link. Although the extra speed and the usage of fire arrows made Young Link an ideal choice, his range was still sub par in comparison to his older self. Ultimately, he is a good character. But is he good enough to make the leap to the Wii?
Frankly, it does not look like Young Link will appear on the Wii in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Aside from the fact that he is terribly wimpy and addicted to that sweet, sweet milk (I bet he is just interested in Malon), he is identical in every conceivable way to his older self. The only way to differentiate his attacks would be to include weapons and abilities exclusive to the games that Young Link is featured in. But can anyone picture transforming into a Deku Scrub, Goron, and a Zora in order to do battle in Super Smash Bros. Melee? Or using the grappling rope or deku leaf from Wind Waker? To be truthful, it does not make for an exciting fighting experience. Nah. I think Young Link is destined to sit this one out.
Do I? Do I really have to catch ‘em all?
The last Pokemon game that I ever played while growing up was the re-design of Pokemon Red and Blue known as Pokemon Yellow: The Pikachu Edition. And, to be perfectly honest, Pikachu was immediately removed from my party in favour of my preferred Pokemon: Psyduck. As a result of this of this dislike of yellow rats, I never actually got to use a Pichu, although if I had - he would have been named ‘Assface’ and he would have been dispatched solely to die in battle in a lacklustre finish (I figure using ‘Growl’ or ‘Pussy Tackle’ would have done the job).
Long story short, Pichu is an absolutely terrible character. He was created as a pre-evolution of Pikachu for Pokemon Gold and Silver, and he was added to Super Smash Bros. Melee to increase the character count without really making a new character. Ultimately, Pichu’s bumbling attacks and his remarkable skill at hurting himself (he’s probably emo) would lead to many gamers ignoring his existence entirely, assuming the square adjacent to Pikachu was intended to be an empty void.
If Pichu somehow surfaces in Super Smash Bros. Brawl, I will make it my personal burden to travel the world - on foot - and kill Satoshi Tajiri in a horrific, Kill Bill style massacre. Maybe that will teach him to stop playing God with retarded little animals that people store in fucking balls. How many Pokemon exist now? 4 x 1080? Good riddance.
Another Pokemon? This is becoming unbearable.
Jigglypuff is another one of those annoying little creatures created by Satoshi Tajiri to appeal to crazed children addicted to collecting things. As a result of this, Jigglypuff has appeared in video game, television, anime, manga, trading card, plush, plastic, and - I can only assume - chewing gum form. Completely whored out by Nintendo, Jigglypuff is one of 493 (as of the release of Diamond and Pearl) Pokemon that can easily keep Nintendo alive under their own steam.
This pink blog made its first appearance in Super Smash Bros. as one of the unlockable characters. Mimicking Kirby’s ability to float gracefully, Jigglypuff seemed like an incredibly basic character. However, there are many subtle abilities that Jigglypuff possesses that make her (it is a girl, right?) a force to be reckoned with. In fact, one of the guys I lived with in Village One claims to have beaten Event Match 51, where you fight Ganondorf, Mewtwo and Giga Bowser, using the timid and playful Jigglypuff. This impressed me greatly, since I have not beaten Event Match 51 at all (although Jake has).
Will Jigglypuff make a return? I’m inclined to think that she will. Jigglypuff has been in the game from the start, and she has evolved (not a Pokemon reference) into a decent fighter. Plus, she is one of the few female characters in the game. And you need to have characters that appeal to some of those little kids out there? You know the ones. I’m talking about the kids who were born after the Super Nintendo came out.
Poor children.
Now this is really getting ridiculous. The fourth - and thankfully, the last - Pokemon featured in Super Smash Bros. Melee was none other than the extremely rare Psychic-type Pokemon known as Mewtwo. The origins of the Pokemon are a little sketchy, but it appears to have been cloned or birthed somehow by the Pokemon known as Mew (hence the ingenious name Mewtwo).
His appearance in Super Smash Bros. Melee presented two things to gamers: a challenge that required 20 hours of melee play to be completed, and another Pokemon character that people were reluctant to use. Granted, Mewtwo is extremely powerful. And he has a lot of fantastic attacks. But how many Pokemon can they expect us to tolerate? There are 493 Pokemon in existence. If we are going to keep adding Pokemon to Super Smash Bros. Melee, we may as well just make a game where it is only Pokemon fighting each other until they faint and must be recalled.
Oh…wait…
To try to form a conclusion out of this mess, will Mewtwo reappear in Super Smash Bros. Brawl? The jury is still out on this one. While we all may be annoyed to death by snotty nosed children and their incredibly pointless Pokemon RPGs (I just hurt the genre by saying that), Mewtwo is a decent character to play as. He has a nice recovery ability - teleport - as well as a lot of interesting attacks. However, he ultimately seems to be a blend of Samus’ charging energy shot, Mario’s cape ability, and Sheik’s teleportation jump. Take a look at him again, and tell me I’m not right. Ultimately, he may return to Super Smash Bros. Brawl, even if his purpose it to bolster the ranks.
Mr. Game and Watch. Some call him a pioneer. Others, a visionary. And all the ladies call him the man who was to two dimensional to carry on a long-term relationship. Ha. Give me a break, I have done a lot of writing here.
Mr. Game and Watch is not really a Nintendo character in the traditional sense. He has never been addressed by that name, nor has he ever truly existed as a character. Instead, Mr. Game and Watch is merely an amalgamation of all the best efforts of the numerous Game and Watch releases. It as if they put all of their old hardware into a blender, let it run for several weeks, and then poured out this little guy. An interesting character to play as, and annoying character to play against, Game and Watch provided a lot of hard-hitting abilities (if used correctly), as well as a fantastic throw move.
Whether he will appear in Super Smash Bros. Brawl is hardly worth debating. The answer is no. He probably wont. Mr. Game and Watch is more of a gimmick character. In a game showcasing Nintendo’s numerous decades worth of creations, Mr. Game and Watch was a homage to one of their earliest efforts in its purest form. It is similar to how R.O.B. was featured as an unlockable racer in Mario Kart DS. It was never an addication of R.O.B. being inducted into Nintendo’s upper echelons as a respected character. As much as it may hurt him to hear it, Mr. Game and Watch was a gimmick character - pure and simple. It is likely that he will be replaced by a new gimmick character this year. R.O.B.? Captain N? Who knows. The point is, I highly doubt that Mr. Game and Watch will make a return.
Even still, I’m going to throw an extra mushroom his way because I am rooting for him. He is a video game veteran. And he deserves to be in Brawl. Also, it will keep him from turning to drugs again, like he did in the eighties.
A Japanese exclusive character until recently, Marth is one of the Lord characters from the Fire Emblem series. To be perfectly honest, I know very little about him. All that can be said is that he was a peculiar, feminine hair style. Also, he is wearing a tiara. And - to be perfectly honest - I thought it was a woman for the first two months that I owned the game.
Nevertheless, Marth is still a cool character to use. And, it is the only character that Andreas can actually function with in Super Smash Bros. Melee. With lightning fast sword swipes and a range that reaches into next week, Marth is an excellent melee fighter (and an even more adept sword fighter).
Despite the threat of the removal of Japanese only characters (or at least, the majority of them), I suspect that Marth will grace us once more on the Wii. If not because of the excellent and unique playstyle, then at least because the castle stage featured in the majority of the promotional images and videos has to be taken from the Fire Emblem universe. Think about it. Giant castle, with some sort of red flag that does not have the Triforce symbol on it. It does not scream ‘Zelda level’ to me. And who else has a castle?
Hmm…Perhaps Mr. Four and a Half Mushrooms can tell us. Ka-pow!
Haha. I lied! I only gave him four just to spite all you Marth lovers. I despise Marth, and he is lucky I do not take off a mushroom for every time Andreas has beaten me with him. I am not giving out any Nega-Mushrooms here.
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Roy may be a Fire Emblem character, but the first time he made an appearance in North America was in Super Smash Bros. Melee. The actual game in which he was featured had yet to be released, and - as a result - his first appearance and Super Smash Bros. debut are one and the same.
To get down to the nitty-gritty of the whole ordeal, Roy is not a likely candidate for Super Smash Bros. Brawl. You may shrug, look around and say, “Why Mr. Blog-man, why?” And to that I say, “Because, he is a goddamn copy of Marth and you know it!”
We do not tolerate clone characters around these parts.
_And so concludes the assessment of all of the original characters. You have endured an absurdly extensive read, and come out the other end a true hero. _
_But wait, there is more. As stated before, there are still 30 or more new characters that have yet to be reviewed. _
Perhaps you would like me to whet your palette with such an offering.
Very well.
In the reviews for new characters, I have employed a new aesthetic style and rating card, as well as two seperate ratings based in the following categories:
Compatibility will assess how well the character would fit into Super Smash Bros. Brawl, assessing the offensive abilities, recovery attacks, and potential throw maneuvers of the character.
Likelihood will assess the probability of a character’s appearance based on: history with Nintendo, gaming lineage, and the number of characters from the same or similar franchises already present.
As promised, here is the first of many new characters to be reviewed:
A New Challenger Comes!
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After the official announcement that Wario was joining the cast of Super Smash Bros. Brawl as a playable character, and as a representative of his own franchise, the people out there in the Interspace got into quite a stir over whether his younger brother, Waluigi, would be tagging along for the ride. It was certainly a valid question. Would Luigi’s doppelganger be joining the fray in the fall?
To determine that, we must assess Waluigi. He is a peculiar Nintendo creation. To date, Waluigi has not been featured in a single main stream Mario title. Created and unveiled for the release of Mario Tennis on the N64, Waluigi has merely become a stand-in character for all the Mario sports titles, Mario party games, and - disturbingly - the Mario DDR spinoff.
As far as attacks go, Waluigi would be forced to be similar to Wario in many ways. However, he could be altered to favour his usage of piranha plants in Mario Party 3, as well as the abilities of Wrecking Crew character - Foreman Spike - who is believed to be the inspiration for Waluigi. Regardless of the potential places to draw inspiration, Waluigi’s attacks and abilities for Super Smash Bros. Brawl would likely have to be created from scratch.
Since Waluigi has not appeared in anything but spin-off titles, it seems unlikely that he has the merit to be added into the cast of Super Smash Bros. Brawl. When you take into account that a cast of Mario, Luigi, Bowser, and Peach is already pushing it for Mario-related characters, you have to assume that the creators of the game will try to cut back a little bit. The game is meant to showcase a variety of Nintendo characters: it is not just a Mario Bros. fighting game.
Compatibility:
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He has plenty of places to draw potential attacks from, but none of them truly stand out in any real way. Waluigi has nothing attached to him, unless they have him attacking with tennis rackets and golf clubs.
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Likelihood:
Waluigi is a decent character, but he is completely static. There is nothing to him, and he does not have an entrenched history with Nintendo. In my opinion, Nintendo should churn out a solid platforming title with Wario and Waluigi as villains to the Mario Bros., or even as playable characters, before Waluigi will have enough meat to him to warrant a spot in Super Smash Bros. Brawl.
Images:
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Check back later for more reviews of potential characters, ranging from foreign properties owned by Konami and Capcom, to some of Nintendo’s classic franchises, and even reaching into the extensive gaming libraries of the Orient to bring you some characters that have never seen our shores.
The Tryouts “˜07 Day One - Day Two - Day Three - Day Four - Day Five - Final Roster The Rejects