Sometimes, I regret going to the University of Waterloo for my education. I think I would have been much happier had I gone to the Vancouver Film School (which was my desire in the beginning).

VFS

Check it out.

The Wii attacks persist to this day.

Some faith/ministry group called Ethur has pointed out that the Nintendo Wii provides access to pornography, and they are warning parents of the potential dangers.

People are paranoid and delusional. You can access pornography on cell phones, computers, laptops, blackberrys, PSPs, and Nintendo Wiis. Sure. They also sell pornography magazines in every corner drug store, two shelves up from your child’s favourite Pokemon “collectors” magazine, or your daughter’s next issue of J-14.

Grow up people. Pornography is just as plentiful as it has always been. Learn how to watch out for your own kids, and if you ever decide to boycott something, boycott Disney films that come on VHS. VHS is a format chosen by the porn industry.

SPOILERS: This post may contain spoilers pertaining to the Nintendo Wii title, The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, as well as Resident Evil, Resident Evil: Code Veronica, and Myst V. If you have already played these games, and consider reading onward to be worth the risk, then proceed. If you have not played these games, stop now. If your name is Binkle, and you read beyond this sentence, shoot yourself. Because I wash my hands of any further spoilerage. :P

Alright. I have to say that this game is absolutely fantastic. No fooling. This game feels like a more thoroughly evolved adventure title than previous iterations of the series, and certain areas of the game help it to feel almost like Prince of Persia, or even Myst titles. Now, I’m currently only up to the Lakebed Temple, but I have a few predictions.

In much the same way that I predicted Wesker’s teachery in Resident Evil, Alfred’s cross-dressing in Resident Evil: Code Veronica X, and Esher’s psychotic evility in Myst V, I am anticipating Midna’s treachery or inevitable fucking up of my shit. My reasons for this stem back to the beginning of the game, because she seemed far too sinister to stay good forever.

Initially, due to the red hair (a trait found in those of Gerudo ethnicity), and the ability to use powerful magic (again, exhibited by Gerudos most famously), I anticipated that the big reveal following the first three dungeons (a custom of Zelda games) would be that Midna was the evil hellspawn of the Dark Lord Ganon, and she was seeking the Fused Shadows to release him. After the final light spirit informed me that there were four Fused Shadows, and not three as Midna had led me to believe, I began to suspect her treachery even more. Especially considering she appears to be wearing one has her stylish headpiece.

So, I predict that Midna is one evil bitch, and she is going to betray me - and come crawling back when Daddy doesn’t love her anymore. But who knows. I have been wrong in the past. Still, I question my own prediction by wondering what the game mechanics will be when Midna is gone. She is - in essence - my fairy. And she is useful for attacking in the Twilight. And surely the Twilight will not be removed after the first three dungeons. For shame.

But that is all I have to say on the issue.

Actually, one final thought: Since when the hell can a fucking baby open up a series of stores? I mean, really. Fuckin’ punk with his Malo Mart. I want to leap over the counter and kill that smug bastard.

It is a sad fact of life that “all good things must come to an end”.

My head nearly caved in from the beating dealt to me by this life lesson on Friday, February 16th, 2007. For those of you who are not already aware, Samantha B. and I have broken up. While the relationship was extremely enjoyable in its prime, I did not think it really had any potential to last. And - to be honest - the two of us had crashed headfirst into a rough patch since I got back from school. I’m inclined to think my preoccupation with university killed the whole thing, but the realist in me acknowledges numerous other factors.

While the experience was extremely difficult for me - despite the fact that I was the dumper, not the dumpee - I feel I will manage to push past it. In the past, my heart and mind have been forced to do battle with the paranoia that is so neatly intertwined with the thought of never meeting another special girl and other feelings of insecurity. But it is all nonsense: the reality of the situation is dependant entirely on my own actions. And I refuse to be shackled to depressing thoughts on the issue.

And so, I am able to walk away from the situation reasonably unscathed. There are times where I feel regret for how things turned out in the end, but I know such feelings are inevitable, and are likely to pass. Nevertheless, I do miss her. And I hope to never forget her. We have agreed to still be friends, but I question how long such friendships truly last.

Anyway, there is the explanation of that. Just for those of you who did not know. Andrew found out through Facebook, and he attempted to console me by brutally slaughtering my forces in a game of Starcraft. All the while, Binkle called for rounds of comforting hot chocolate to be poured down his gullet, in order to pay tribute to the times Sam and I enjoyed together. At least, I suspect that was the reason. His insatiable lust for foodstufs may have also been a factor.

Now you know the rest of the story.

A new age has finally arrived.

With a great deal of sweat and toil - none of which was my own - that we have relocated to our new abode: a safe haven where the denizens of the night can run wild and torment the innocent. Or, perhaps we will stick to being jovial and witty. Only vast sums of legal tender being poured into my bank account will reveal the truth.

Recently, The Box lay in shambles as I grappled with two beasts of impressive power and might - PHP and CSS - in order to properly lay the foundations of the new era of all things Boxesque. Caleb commented regularly on the disorder that The Box faced in its dying throes, and - if witnesses are to be believed - he may have even wept.

But all is now well. The Box has returned, displaying its traditional lavish beauty and robust content, so as to satisfy your frivolous appetites. In time, you will again begin to notice change. They will be swift and graphic, but - in the end - you will all feel as if you are better people for it.

This post is merely the initial tactical assault to your senses for the new space. There will be many that follow. At least three. Quite possibly more. And they will all tear through the fabric of your brain, stealing away your cranial virginity like so many”¦

Good Lord”¦where was I going with that one?

The point is that we have ushered in a new age together, as a network. Andrew has been enveloped into the collective and has become one of us. And for this new addition,w e are thankful. If only we could have assimilated Caleb, Fraser and Liam with the same temptations of sweet, digital treats. But alas, we will have to settle for the one called Andrew.

There will be more to follow.

For those of you with Wiis, here it is.

2663 5676 0299 9232

That is my Wii number. Let our Miis be free and Mingle!

But what I really wanted to talk about in this briefest of posts is how Nintendo is a devious little bastard. Collectively. Or perhaps, he who helms the Virtual Console.

I’ve been looking at their pricing system, and it is actually an interesting feat. They have structured the cards that you purchase, and the amount that you pay, so that you will keep buying cards. Observe the pricing of the SNES, TurboGrafx, and Sega games. 800 pts, 600 pts, and 800 pts.

But the cards are only sold in quantities of 2000 pts. So, if at any time you choose to purchase a game from one of these systems, they’ve roped you in. Because you will always be left with extra points that cannot be spent (or you will be forced to by a TurboGrafx game, which no one really wants anyway).

Imagine I buy a 2000 pts card. And I want to purchase Kid Icarus (NES, 500pts), Kirby Adventure (NES, 500pts), and Super Castlevania IV (SNES, 800pts). After making these purchases, I have 200 pts left over. But these points cannot be redeemed in any monetary way. I cannot have the points transfered back to a credit card, or points card which I then sell or something. No. Those points are stuck there, and I need to use them.

And for that, I need another card. 2200 pts is the current balance. Now, I go and make my next ring of purchases. I want to get Donkey Kong Country (SNES, 800pts), Super Mario Bros. 3 (NES, 500 pts),  and Super Metroid (SNES, 800pts). Dammit. Now I’m left with 100pts lingering.

So, I buy another card.

And the cycle continues. It is genius. The only way you can avoid it is by buying only NES and N64 games , or by buying the occasional TurboGrafx game to offset the points numbers (as 1 SNES (or Sega) + 2 TurboGrafx = 2000pts).

It is just plain mean.