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Act One: Childhood’s End’s Ending

Ages ago, Josh talked to me on MSN and was singing the praises of Childhood’s End. He described it as amazing. His use of language led me to believe he was rather enthralled with the story.

Now, I had remembered reading it in elementary school for a book report/independent study type deal. I remembered the plot, vaguely, but I couldn’t quite remember how it ended. So, since it was receiving such high praises, I figured ‘What the hell? Let’s read!’

And I did. The entire part of the book known as ‘Earth and The Overlords’ was great. A lot of mystery and intrigue. When they revealed what the Overlords were, and how they were such a significant part of our past, I began to enjoy the story. Then, it seems Arthur Clarke must have dropped his pen (or pencil) and walked away from the book for fifteen years. Afterwards, he returned and wrote utter junk.

It was ludicrous. I was expecting the entire book to be explaining away religion with alien encounters and other sci-fi methods of lunacy, but instead, I was disappointed. All of a sudden, mankind has been turned into the otherworldly sustenance for something known as the Overmind and I’m painfully confused.

The story disappointed me. By the end of the novel, I was only finishing it out of some sort of literary obligation to the book. I can’t believe I’m going to have to pay overdue fines for this book…

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Act Two: Man In The Mirror

I’ve tried - in vain - to continue writing my book which has been titled Man in the Mirror. I’ve been working on the second chapter for the cumulative sum of two weeks, and have yet to achieve any result that I can honestly claim to be proud of.

However, while I was getting dressed today (it’s a highly creative point in my routine), I developed five new characters based off of some friends. Originally, the only people I knew who had been implimented into the story were myself, Fraser and Andrew. Now, I’ve developed some characters to represent Caleb, Binkle, Cory, Amy and Jenn. Caleb’s character is one of the cooler ones. Cory is the second coolest of the five, while Binkle’s character is going to be fierce. Amy and Jenn are just two exotic dancers. No, it’s not wishful thinking. It’s because of that one dream I had in ages past (that blog entry has since been deleted, otherwise I would have linked to it).

I’m sure after Binkle reads this, he will hound me about the nature of his character. When I made up my personal “How well do you know me?” quiz, he asked if I had based any character off of him. Well, now there is one.

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Act Three: Shh…don’t tell anyone

The title is simply a retarted reference to the title of my Discrete Math course (the discrete part , in case you are truly that oblivious).

If I do well on my next test, I could have 100% in that class at mid-terms. That is so rockin’ to the max. I just can’t believe my luck! I’m doing better than Andrew in that class. Finally!!

Au revoir

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Act One: The Exchange

In several more days, Amy will have departed to France. In this brief period of time, life will revert to the way things once were and the universe will be whole again.

In the days following her departure, Binks and I can expect Andrew to scurry back to the only friends he knows with his tail between his legs. Binks will not be as accepting of Andrew’s return as I, which isn’t saying much.

But of course - gentle reader - I realise you are not completely aware of what I will tentatively title, “The Hovercraft Chronicles”. Let me begin my tale of daring doo and therapeutic miracles.

Binkle was sitting in class, quietly contemplating the existence of the universe as he puffed on his pipe when Mr. Smith announced the assignment.

“You will be building a hovercraft,” the dwarfish teacher bellowed out to the class. The room grew tense with the expectation of group selection. Binks paid this no mind, as he had a trump card group in the bag. His masterful selections: Andreas - taker of tech classes and adept of the table saw - his skills with construction would prove to be monumentally valuable in the construction of the hovercraft; Andrew - obtainer of large averages - and ingenious physics bent mind who would surely be able to formulate theories on a whim.

But Binks was deceived. Andrew was not acting as the prophesized ace-in-the-hole, but instead had taken on such an infantile mentality as to be useless to the group. Andrew provided no consistent help whatsoever to the design or construction of the hovercraft. In the weeks that followed, Binks would slowly descend further and further into madness, until he reached the breaking point. Like a wave splashed upon the dry sands of a beach, Binks’ efforts were dispersed and he could stand no more.

He murdered Andrew.

…

Oh, I’m sorry. Wishful thinking seems to have strayed into the realm of fiction. But still…

Yes. So Andrew is being useless. Binkle despises him. I chose to overdramatize the story, because there isn’t really much meat to it. When Binkle explodes, you’ll have a monumentally interesting update. But until then, nothing of note has arisen.

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Act Two: Athenian Tales

While the hovercraft is the largest concern on the mind of one Binks Binkle (a clever alias…), everyone else is delightfully enthralled with the talk of prom, graduation and getting drunk at both.

Today, Travis was at my lunch table working on some math work. Talk ensued. From his use of words and phrasings, he led me to believe that he has not yet asked Dianne Murray - in all her splendour - to go to the prom with him. In fact, it seems he has no intention of ever doing it. He is going to be AT prom with her and some friends, but not officially as her date. And in this age of titles and association, being dubbed her date is what really matters.

While he may be content to simply enjoy the pleasure of her company, others may move in…

In math today, we were talking about a variety of subjects. The class is, after all, discrete mathematics making it a forum of intellectual brilliance. A pinnacle of excellence amongst the other, slightly dirtier, minds of the school. There was talk of parties, drinking and arrangements for things after prom. In addition, Adam Sheldon - a guy who I can’t seem to place in the high school “caste system” - got onto the topic of hentai. If you don’t know what it is, I would not encourage you to google it.

Anyway, there was talk of a graduating camping trip after prom, consisting of a few of Dianne’s friends and some other people. This greatly interested me, because I would absolutely love to go camping with girls like Dianne. There was also talk about a party after prom (or graduation, I’m not sure) where the graduating class would get together off-site and party like it is 1995!

Whoo!!

But until then, its just wishful thinking for me to be associated with women in some extra-curricular experience of some enjoyment. I’m just not sociable. It’s a curse…and I hate it.

But, the last note to make about graduation is my pictures have not yet made it to the school. I missed the photo dates AT the school, and instantly removed any chance of appearing in the composite. However, I did get some pictures taken and I will appear in the yearbook, my face plastered beside my all too witty comments. The photographer has been trying for a week, but due to a fault on her part, she cannot contact the school. Mr. Vanderhyden (our yearbook editor…person) has contacted her several times, and given her his e-mail address and phone number, etc. To date, she has not contacted him. She is having issues with her e-mail, and has phoned the wrong teacher and left a message, which was passed on too late.

It’s long, and complicated. Sadly, my face will be forgotten, as will any actions I have partaken in during highschool.

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Act Three: State of the Union

The title of this act may be slightly misleading, but I’ll continue as planned with my discussion topic for it. There are a lot of relationships that are going around, and I’ve caught wind of a few of them. I’ll post them here for examination, and discuss a little about them and the state of things as they stand. I’ll also make a few observations about what I’ve gathered. Here we go.Couple: Andrew and Amy Status: Fucked Up? Explain: Andrew and Amy have been going out for 10 months now (although Andrew believes it to be eight), and things appear to be going strong. Their constant make out sessions at our school’s lunch table continue to increase in disgusting factor on a daily basis. In the near future, our table will be over-run by the sinful orgy that inspired Binks’ quote in the sidebar of my blog. Will the break up soon? Possibly. Josh is optimistic about that fact. I feel that they will be together until Andrew goes off to university. Then, they’ll grow distant. In a drunken stupor, he’ll sleep with a girl from his residence. Amy will find out, and call him a slut. He’ll call her a cocktease, and it will all fall apart. Binkle believes they will break up, Andrew will shower, and then the universe will be righted again as Andrew searches for another maternal influence (his uses of a girlfriend).

Couple: Binks and Erin Status: Healthy Explain: Anyone who reads this blog likely knows of the relationship between Binks and the mysterious Erin of Ayton. She has been told of in legends long lost to the ages as a beautiful valkyrie who steals the heart of people with five letter nicknames. Honestly, I know very little about them. Things seem fairly decent though. Binks spends a healthy amount of time divided between her, his friends, his family and his school work. He isn’t showing any visible signs of strain in the relationship, and whenever I talk to her, she always talks about Binks. Good sign of a healthy relationship.

Couple: Travis and Dianne Status: Not involved Explain: Until Travis grows a pair and asks her out, this description will not have much meat to it. Dianne - to me - seems very timid and shy, pegging her as the type who will not make the first move. So, Travis has to get in there and say something before they run the risk of never seeing eachother again. However, one must consider if Dianne actually likes Travis. If his feelings aren’t reciprocated, the resulting downfall in his confidence could be disasterous to his future. Seriously. Travis does not take failure well, and a decline from Dianne would be a failure in his eyes. I’ll keep tabs on this.

Couple: Andrew and Dianne Status: Bizarre? Explain: They aren’t really dating. This Andrew is the same Andrew who commits in the sinful orgies, and this Dianne is the same one who seems timid and shy. The main issue is, I’ve noticed in Discrete Math that she laughs at every single one of his jokes, no matter how painfully stupid, and she is always staring at him when he’s not looking. It’s a little wierd. Maybe she is just staring into space and not actually looking at him, but there are often times I see the stare. The sad thing is, Andrew doesn’t notice. The sadder thing is, had he played his cards right, he could have been dating Dianne instead of Amy. That’s a huge step up the feminine ladder. Monumental. Actually, they’re completely different ladders. However, a relationship between Dianne and Andrew would likely benefit Andrew and curse Dianne.

Couple: Andreas and Jenna…and Brian? Status: Unfortunate Love Triangle Explain: Practically from the first moment he laid eyes on her, Andreas has been madly in love with Jenna, the daughter of our high school’s female gym teacher. In fact, for the past three years, she is the only girl he has had eyes for. The guy really likes her though. He was working up the courage to ask her to prom, when Brian (a guy I’ve known since elementary school) swooped in and began dating Jenna. So, Andreas is stuck in limbo. Jenna knows of Andreas’ feelings. How she feels in return is a mystery. Brian is a decent guy. He’s not an ass, so its not like Jenna is in a shitty situation. That’s the problem with a love triangle like this. Both the guys are good, kind hearted gentleman folk to whom chivalry is no stranger. The girl in the middle made a choice, and it was by no means a bad one, but it can be devestating to the third party. I feel sorry for Andreas. I can’t even imagine how he feels.

Couple: Dean and Girl A and Guy B Status: A Mystery To You, But Not To Me Explain: Dean has not given me any comments that were “on the record” yet, so I do not feel comfortable posting any specific details about the situation at the time. If and when Dean ever gives the okay of his own accord, then the posting shall commence. Until then, not a word.

Couple: Me and Any Girl Status: No such luck. Explain: I’m a coward.

And so, that is how things stand right now. Thought it might interest people to know. Anyway, this entry has taken me about half an hour to think on and write. I’m off to play the demo of Splinter Cell 3 that Caleb has graciously let me borrow.

Two final notes in relation to format: 1) Soon I will be customizing my site with personal quotes and banners designed by my brother in photoshop. I’m going to try to make this place look as cool as possible, and deviate a bit from the standard template that makes my blog look so similar to Binks. 2) I will be seperating each significant entry into three acts. No reason in particular. I just think it is cool.

Adieu

No comments on this entry. I pretty much just wanted to post this video clip. Quite astounding, especially as you reach the ending of it. This will only touch the arts of avid Nintendo fans. Otherwise, you may not even care.

Check out the new Penny Arcade. It’s freakin’ hilarious.

One more week of prom ticket sales. No signs of an extension.

Werd out…ya’ll.

Prepare yourself to be rocked by the most obese blog entry thou hath ever seen.

This one is going to be a three parter, so if you feel it necessary to grab some popcorn, a blanket, and your high school sweetheart, feel free to do so.

I’ll wait.

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Act One: A City of Vices

The first thing that I must spill my guts over (I’m witty) is the release of Sin City. It came, I saw, and it rocked! Absolutely brilliant. Quite possibly one of the finest pieces of media entertainment that has graced my irises to date. It was based off of the set of graphic novels by Frank Miller, specifically The Hard Goodbye, The Big Fat Kill, and That Yellow Bastard.

The performances on the part of Mickey Rourke (Marv), Bruce Willis (Hartigan) and Elijah Wood (Kevin) were excellent. Leading ladies that sparkled and shined were Devon Aoki (Miho) and Alexis Bledel (Becky), who were both surprisingly interesting prostitutes.

Another notable performance would have to be to Marley Shelton (The Customer) and Josh Hartnett (The Salesman) for their absolutely stupendous opening to the film. Hartnett only appeared in the bookends of the film (the beginning and end, to the unwise) but still, his character was so cool. He played some hired assassin, who’s motto is, the customer is always right. Hence, the name.

Here’s the excerpt from the end of the opening scene:

The Salesman: The wind rises electric. She’s soft and warm and almost weightless. Her perfume is sweet promise that brings tears to my eyes. I tell her that everything will be all right; that I’ll save her from whatever she’s scared and take her far far away. I tell her that I love her. [silenced gunshot] The Salesman: The silencer makes a whisper of the gunshot. I hold her close until she’s gone. I’ll never know what she was running from. I’ll cash her check in the morning.

A very good scene. Absolutely amazing really. I’m tempted to go to the theatres simply to see it all over again.

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Act Two: Home on the Shooting Range

Yesterday, after I returned from school, I fell asleep at the computer table. When I awoke, my father was making supper and my mother was not speaking to him. I asked my sisters what was going on, and they said it had something to do with me. I wondered, “How, I haven’t even been awake. What could I have possibly done wrong in all this time?”

But anyway, my parents are fighting with eachother, but they are taking it out on us. This is ridiculous, because we didn’t do anything. We get punished if we do something wrong, we get punished if we do something right, we get punished if we don’t do anything. There is no way to win in this family.

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Act Three: The Third Act

I conceded to the wishes of the masses, and I purchased a prom ticket. My ticket number is 80. Out of a graduating class of 200 or so students, this is not a good sign. Sure, there is a significant number of people, but 80 is a really small number. It’s staggeringly ridiculous.

Anyway, I figure the night wont be a complete waste. If I can squeeze in a dance with Dianne Murray, Rachel Voros, Kathryn Nicholson, Lindsay Dicksen, Kate Weersink, or Karen Vanderwalle it would be nice. If I could dance with all of them, it would be even better. Doubt it’ll happen, but at least I can get my hopes up and feel the staggering effects of the pain of their plummet.

Anyway, I’m off. I’m going to go read some of the absolute garbage they are toting over on Fan Fiction Net. Check it out if you want to become an incoherent slob. If not, then don’t go near it. Please. For God’s sake!!!

Later.

My previous entry on this topic was mysteriously deleted, so I have to write this again. This entry isn’t about actually writing for Capcom, but it does detail the response to my attempted contact with the good people at Nintendo. So, following this will be the e-mail I sent, as well as the subsequent response:

Greetings,

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This e-mail is being sent out because of my aspiration to become a writer in the video game industry. While reading over some articles online, it came to my attention that a beneficial method of gaining a reputation as a writer amongst video game developers is to begin working at a magazine, or any other video gamerelated publication. So, I felt compelled to ask. What does it require to gain a position as a distinguished writer of Nintendo Power (or any gaming magazine, for that matter)? What credentials are necessary? Is it a difficult field to break into? And what can you tell me about writing scripts for video games?

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Thank you very much for your time.

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Jordan Grant

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P.S. I am aware that this e-mail is composed of more questions than comments. For that, I apologize.

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Hi Jordan, _Thank you for your e-mail. _ While you have some great questions, we don’t have access to the type of information that you’re looking for. We try to use e-mail primarily to gather feedback about our products and services. We also provide brief answers to critical questions or try to let our fans know where they can find the answers they’re looking for on our web site. Unfortunately, we’re not equipped to track down the official response you would like to your questions. However, we do appreciate your enthusiasm and curiosity. I can tell you that unless otherwise specified, all of our job openings (including those for Nintendo Power magazine) are located at our Redmond, Washington headquarters. You can find out about current job openings by calling Nintendo’s Jobline at 425-861-2170. You can also go to the Corporate section of our web site (www.nintendo.com/corp/index.jsp) and select “Employment Opportunities” for a list of jobs currently available, as well as information on applying for those jobs. We interview qualified applicants who are at least 18years old. Sincerely, Nintendo of America Inc. Greg Hamilton

While this response was nice, it didn’t really tell me anything I wasn’t aware of aside from the age limit of application (which was lower than I expected). Unfortuantely, after a little more research, I discovered that there are, in fact, no openings whatsoever to work for Nintendo Power (not even as someone who did some graphic designing for the pages). So, although it was a wild ride, this avenue ended in a big bust.

I’m hoping Capcom responds to me with a much more useful response - if they even respond at all. I am discouraged that their e-mail servers may block any incoming e-mails from free e-mail services. In which case, I’d have to use my dad’s e-mail.

Adios.

The prom for St. Michael’s Catholic Secondary School falls on a Friday. Friday the 13th, to be exact. On May the 13th, the graduating class of St. Mikes will be finding pleasure in each other’s company at the Grecian Odyssey themed prom dance/gathering/thing.

I talked to Binks at school, and he says he is going to attend the gala with his mysterious girlfriend, Erin of the mythical land of Ayton. Andrew will undoubtedly be dragged to the prom by Amy although techniquely the average person would expect that he would lead and she would follow - not because of gender roles in a relationship, but because it is his prom and not hers.

As for me, I don’t think I’m going. It just doesn’t seem like it would be an exciting event for me, because I’ll be outside of the loop. When you examine my group of friends, you see two distinct groups: 1) The people I’ve known since St. Als 2) The people I’ve known since the start of high school

The people I’ve known since St. Als (Andrew, Binkle, and I suppose Amy) will all have their minds occupied by “other things” while attending the prom. As for the guys I’ve met since high school (Dean, Fraser, Caleb, Andreas, Blake, etc), I am distant from them and we rarely ever do anything. They will probably be huddled in their own little group at prom, or be hanging out with their dates respectively. For some reason, I can picture Dean and Caleb lugging along their Nintendo DS systems.

As for me, I’d just be sitting there alone. I won’t have a date. I can absolutely verify that because I know I will never summon the courage to ask someone, and I doubt anyone has been bet to bring me to the prom. :P So, to avoid sitting pathetically at the sidelines, I have decided to forego the event altogether. It’s just a big waste of time that I don’t feel I need to bother with.

Ta ta.