Here is a list of how to unlock characters. I’ll update it when I figure out how to unlock the last three. By the way, if you unlock them using the Subspace Emissary, you are a pansy. Schmucks.

All characters can be unlocked somehow through the Subspace Emissary.

Ness - Reflect ten projectiles - Play five VS matches

Marth - Beat Classic mode with any character - Play 10 VS matches

Luigi - Beat Classic mode with no continues - Play 22 VS matches

Falco - Beat 100 Man Melee - Play 50 VS matches

Captain Falcon - Beat Classic Mode on Normal in under 12 minutes - Play 70 VS Matches

Lucario - Beat Target Smash with one character on all difficulty levels - Play 100 VS Matches

R.O.B. - Get 250 different trophies and then play a match - Play 160 VS Matches

Mr. Game and Watch - Complete Target Smash on any single difficulty with 30 characters - Play 250 VS Matches

Sonic - Complete Classic mode on any difficulty with 10 characters - Play ??? VS Matches

Snake - Play 15 matches on Shadow Moses Island - Play ??? VS Matches

Jigglypuff - [If anyone knows the normal way to unlock, please tell me] - Play ??? VS Matches

Toon Link - [If anyone knows the normal way to unlock, please tell me] - Play ??? VS Matches

Wolf - [If anyone knows the normal way to unlock, please tell me] - Play ??? VS Matches

Please observe the counter to the right of the page.

Note the numerous zeroes.

You know where I am.

You know where to find me.

Expect a lapse in posting.

I read through the IGN review for Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

I think that it is a fairly level-headed review, except for one fact. The reviewers (Cassamassina and Bozon) comment on how there should be more third-party characters. I think it is unfair to want a first-party game to have a huge selection of third-party characters. Otherwise, what is the point? Why not criticize Capcom or Square Enix for not having their own Brawl-esque fighter instead of “tut-tutting” Nintendo for not including your favourite game character?

I wanted Isaac and Little Mac to be playable. That being said, I’m not going to cite their absence as a flaw in the game. It has an amazing line up. What more do people want? If Nintendo included everyone’s character on everyone’s wishlist, they would never finish Brawl.

Let it be Cassa… and Bozon. Let it be. Criticize the Subspace Emissary all you wish. But leave the roster be.

So, who really wants to see Metal Gear Solid 4: Gun of the Patriots fail miserably?

Hideo Kojima says that the game does not properly fit on a Blu-ray disc. Yeah. Apparently while his colleagues in the video game industry are making games that easily fit on a dual-layered DVD, Kojima has somehow exceeded the 50GB capacity of a Blu-ray disc.

How is this possible? I have no idea. But I am hoping that he has added in so much flash and so little substance that the game will fail. Because, for the most part, this is why people bought the PS3. Metal Gear Solid 4 is going to have to be to the PS3 what Halo was to the original XBox.

Or, it can flounder. There is something sketchy about the fact that it fills an entire Blu-ray. So, it will either be the most amazing game that anyone has ever seen…or it will be the most over-glorified piece of garbage anyone has ever seen. I guess we shall see.

So, I went to the site for my UWaterloo e-mail, and I was greeted with this message:

“For mywaterloo webmail, please visit www.nexusmail.uwaterloo.ca”

Seriously? Is this a horrible joke? You’ve changed how the site is accessed but - rather than redirecting it - you’ve decided to tell me to visit the proper website. It wasn’t even a link. It was an entirely white page with that line of text at the top.

Lame.

Also, I’m very bitter because RE4: Wii Edition is difficult.