After talking to Andrew today about very important business, he unveiled to me a secret that the world has been keeping for months.

This week is the period for enrollment in courses for the Spring 2007 term at Waterloo.

And here I was caught with my pants down.

So, I search and search to see what the hell is going on? Are my math courses picked for me like last time? Why didn’t I receive an e-mail for all of this? In this age of communication, how can I not find anything? In response to this lack of information, I scrambled to find the Undergraduate Calendar so that I could figure out which courses were available. The pickings were pretty slim. Not because I missed the boat. No. That would have been my fault. Instead, the pickings were slim because there were no fucking options.

My choices in English were limited to trivial subjects that did not interest me. There was no option for Shakespeare, Science Fiction, or Mystery fiction. No. Children’s Literature was the choice I reluctantly accepted. This choice was only made after my interesting preferences for philosophy, psychology, classics, computer science and math electives, and history were all proven to be unavailable for the Spring Term. Oh, and would you believed I actually considered religious studies as a fallback? Yeah. But even those courses weren’t available.

Which begs the question: Why have a spring term if you are not teaching a goddamn thing? I can’t even take courses relevant to my major during the spring term? Do I just graduate ten years later than everyone else? Do I try to teach myself? Is Stream 4 fundamentally broken? Designed by chimpanzees from some sort of genetic engineering experiment? Tell me. Please.

Anyway, I’ve enrolled in my courses. I’ve got an image so that those of you attending Waterloo can have a gander. Also, all of you can scoff at my forced decisions. Hahaha. Laugh it up.

Also, if anyone can throw the name of a good plug-in for images my way, I’d appreciate it. Since…this schedule is difficult to see.

And, for those who don’t/can’t recognize the course codes, there is Linear Algebra, Calculus, More Java, English: Youth and Adolescence, and English: Children’s Literature.

I’m really starting to hate this PD courses. I’m getting eighty e-mails a day reminding me how I am incredibly behind in completing grammar exercises for PD2, or submitting my resume for evaluation for PD1. Hey. PD1 staff. Here is a message for you: ”I got a fucking job! I think my resume is fine! Piss off!”

As for the PD2 grammar exercises and paragraph writing tutorials, I really don’t care. Sure. My writing off the fly may have the occasionally misplaced hyphen or comma or letter but - after proofreading - my writing looks pretty damn good. Certainly better than your average Canadian. I have a decent grasp of the language. Yet, since I do not have the time or the patience to complete these retarded exercises, I am getting punished for it.

On the other hand, you have students at UW like Vanessa (read: illiterate Asian plagiarist) who manage to coast into the math program and will probably pass PD2 (inexplicably) because she is a foreign student. And they certainly love those foreign students. Please take note that I am not racist. I hate people regardless of racial, cultural or religious differences. But, when you use the phrase “Such as that” as a verb, noun, preposition, gerund, and occasionally form an entire sentence from it, there is a serious problem. And - in my opinion - you should be forced to learn the language before you can attend our universities.

I would not go to a university in Korea or Japan and expect the professor to speak English for me. And I would not get a job in one of these countries and force people to struggle to understand me.

Which segues into a topic I wanted to touch on a few weeks ago but I did not have the time.

Language Barriers

Canada is a multi-cultural country. I accept that. We’ve got people from the Orient. From Europe. From Africa. From South America. Hell, I’m sure we’ve got a few Australians kicking around somewhere. And I am fine with that.

What I hate though is when people come over from other countries and refuse to learn English. Yes, I know it is hard, but you should not be able to work in a country if you cannot speak that language. I have watched clients for tax preparation come in and struggle to understand Vanessa. They struggle. A procedure that could take half an hour probably lasts several hours.

And think of what happens when you do not understand English in this country. If you are working in a service position, how can you possibly know what someone is asking for? How can you explain a product or service to someone if you cannot grasp the language? How can you handle tech support? For any customer service job, you should have to be able to speak English properly.

Even in factory jobs, it should be necessary. If your supervisor is explaining to your the safety precautions and emergency response for dangerous machinery, you are putting your life and the lives of others at risk by not understanding. When your boss says “Don’t touch this red button!” and you have no idea what he means as he points to it, you may just go and push that tantalizing red button for the hell of it.

Or, you’re about to cross the road as a truck is barreling towards you. You don’t see it. Some guy yells out “Hey, get the hell off the road! You’re going to die!” And you look back, grin stupidly and say “Yes. Okay sir.” Before you know it, you’re splattered on the road wondering what he was saying.

English should be a requirement for living and working in this country. If not out of courtesy to fellow citizens, then at least for your safety in social and workplace environments.

Which brings up an interesting point about people who are mute. They have to speak American Sign Language, because they cannot speak English. Or any language, for that matter. So, as a corollary to foreigners learning English, it seems only fair that we all know American Sign Language.

I had to process a return for two mute clients a few weeks back (when I thought of this topic). And I had a bit of trouble communicating with them. So, I went online and looked up some simple ASL signs to help explain the tax return. And, ultimately, we got through the procedure okay.

So, in conclusion to all of this (because I am hungry, you are bored, and Sophie has to go outside and pee), I think that people who don’t speak English in this country need to and service personnel should be required to know American Sign Language.

If you have not seen it…you must watch it.

Until you do, your life will be incomplete.

Spoilers to follow. Read on at your own risk.

—

We have seen the faces of four of the final five.

Two of them I suspected.

Samuel Anders was at the top of my list of suspects, simply because he was so persistant to continue his relationship with Kara despite knowing of her adultering it up with Lee. Also, he seemed to be a little too adept at survival for a weak and fleshy human. From a production side, I have to say that there had to be some reason to keep him around, especially after Kara “died”.

Galen Tyrol was my other prime suspect. Of course, it was a little hard to believe considering he did not suffer from the effects of the radiation that subdued Leoben while they were at the munitions station. Of course, Leoben could have been there for hours or days before Tyrol arrived with Galactica.

As for Saul Tigh…well, that I couldn’t have seen coming. I assumed that all of the Cylons would have been recently established within the Galactica fleet.  I did not foresee a veteran of two wars who was the biggest Cylon-basher in the fleet. And Tory Foster? That really came out of nowhere. She is not even an interesting character. But you had to assume that someone near the President was a Cylon. And ever since Billy died…well, who else was there? Still…Tory really only moved into that higher position after Billy died. So…I guess that was kind of lucky.

The fifth Cylon has yet to be revealed. I doubt it will be Gaeta. It looks like he has been the biggest red herring in television. Many will suspect Starbuck, since she has returned from the grave, but even that is hard to believe. After all, the President was having visions of the Opera House just like Starbuck had visions of Leoben (read: not really Leoben). So, she could just be “special”.

Anyway, the season finale kicked ass. I was so amazed by it, and the inclusion of All Along The Watchtower. What a good episode!

According to the recent interview on IGN, actor Jamie Bamber (Apollo) thinks that the fourth season of Battlestar Galactica may be the last. He says that_ “the [ratings] numbers aren’t great and our pickup [for the next season] was much later than it had been before. No one from the studio or network has said anything, but the executive producers have hinted they think it will be [the last season]. I think the writing’s on the wall, as they say.” _

Considering this is one of my two absolute favourite shows on television (Heroes is the other), I have to say that this is a resounding disappointment.

Why does it seem like the sci-fi genre is losing all of its best shows? Stargate SG-1 was cancelled despite the fact that the Ori storyline was really one of the better ones that the show has seen. And now Battlestar Galactica may be seeing the curtain early due to lacklustre ratings? This blows.

Granted, all of us nerds will still have a dose of Stargate Atlantis and Heroes to keep us going…but for how long? If all of these shows are being led to the gallows, how long can Heroes and Stargate Atlantis keep their presence on the air?

This is extremely disappointing. Perhaps the made for TV movie that is being filmed for between Season Three and Four will inspire more people to watch the show, or revitalize the series. Who knows. While I do want it to end, I do not want Season Four to be a rush to get to Earth. While I appreciate the overall storyline - the quest for Earth - it is the smaller stories that examine politics, rights, and the legal framework of this rag-tag fleet.

In many ways, the fleet in Battlestar Galactica exists as a microcosm for humanity. Within it, we are able to see situations that have an analogue in modern issues. The recent episode with Chief Tyrol organizing a strike on the fuel refinement ship due to substandard working conditions was an excellent episode (although it would have helped if Adama and Roslyn had not merely relented within the last five minutes of the episode after being such hard asses for the whole story).

But, I ramble. Galactica, I will keep my fingers crossed that you keep flying. I could not bear to suffer the loss of another priceless sci-fi show. Not again.

I was sitting here surfing the Penny Arcade store in a brief reprive from tax preperation, when a cash supervisor from Wal-Mart walked by and wished one of her cohorts a happy birthday.

All of a sudden, it hit me in the face like 80 pounds of frog legs. I leapt up from my seat and startled the customers as I yelled out “Holy Shit Beasts of Babylon!”

And then I came here, with all the haste that my body could muster. I nearly forgot because I was being dumb, but I ain’t no dummy.

It’s Caleb’s birthday. Happy freakin’ Birthday Caleb! You’re 20 years old. Goddamit. Holy crap! Other profanities to express surprise!

Happy Birthday!

Lowly peasants - drop down on bended knee and acknowledge this - the day of days - with a shoutout in the comments!

Andrew has finally entered our domain of madness. Cry out in despair, ye fleshy mortal, as you are enveloped within the seventh circle of hell known to the serfs of the world as the Red Card Group.

Ahem. Forgive me. Apparently, I was briefly forced into submission by the fiery brands of a demonic figure. But now, I can speak sensibly, and welcome Andrew to the Red Card Group with the launch of his new blog - The Sleeping Giant.

Go there now. Or else.

Fools.

Also, don’t forget to change your blogrolls.